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Wordsmith
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"Oh, no," Cordelia gasped, just before shutting her eyes. She felt that free-fall sensation which accompanies vivid dreams and far too frequently indicated she had lost her balance while enduring a vision, thus foreshadowing her hitting the floor - hard. She hadn't told the guys, partly to prevent them from teasing her and partly because she knew her three big strong men already sympathized with her pain, but she had been reading up on breathing techniques and meditation. She had picked up several volumes on natural childbirth at the library, reasoning that if Lamaze could help women focus past that pain it would help her endure her visions while gleaning important details from the messages.
As the images faded and she became aware of the world around her once again,
she felt Angel's cool hands holding her. Her back was against his chest and
he waited still and silent for her to nod and indicate she was ready to move.
Fortunately, she had skipped breakfast. Sometime the pain of the
visions was so intense that if she moved too quickly afterward she would become
violently nauseous. She took three deep cleansing breaths before unclenching
one hand from where it was gripped tightly around Angel's forearm and trailed
it down to clasp his hand. He helped her to the couch and sat close with his
other arm still loosely around her. Gunn appeared and knelt before her holding
a glass of water and two aspirin. Wesley hovered, still holding his book and
visibly restraining himself from asking what she
had seen.
"Are you all right?" Angel asked.
Cordelia nodded and gave them a weak smile. "I saw...Lindsey," she said. "Route 909, just past a speck on the map called Silver River, mile marker 103. Truck's broke, he's going to need a ride."
Angel growled. Really growled, Cordelia thought, and wasn't that surreal. Ever
since the Darla incident he had gave good grovel but seemed to be hiding the
fact that he was a vampire less and less. Which, she reflected, was good - since
he was a vampire and working on redemption wasn't going to change that until
he was actually redeemed. Then again maybe it wasn't Darla that brought him
out of the vampy closet, maybe it was losing Buffy. Aside from slaying, Cordelia
hadn't spent much time with Angel when he and Buffy had... well, could you call
that dating? Xander and Angel had always rubbed each other the wrong way and
to be frank, the less time her boyfriend had spent with his first crush had
been the better as far as Cordelia had been concerned. She had always expected
to walk in on Xander with Buffy some
night, which was why Willow had been such a shock. It's always the quiet ones,
she thought, noticing Fred creeping down the stairs and staying in the shadows.
For all she knew, Angel had behaved like this - protective and kind of possessive - with Buffy. More than any of the Scoobies, Cordelia knew that a good deal of Xander's animosity toward Angel was because he was a vampire rather than because he was involved with Buffy. Which made Xander's current choice of snuggle bunny just a touch hypocritical, if you asked her. So perhaps Angel letting down his human mask was a sign that he was feeling secure in their little family. Cordy was aware of Fred inching closer. The girl looking longingly at Angel as he danced attendance on Cordelia.
"He can walk," Angel said.
"No." Cordelia was firm. "If I have to have the vision, he's going to be rescued."
"So now we're the auto club?" Angel muttered.
Cordelia turned in his arms, momentarily surprised by just how close they were sitting. She wasn't as blind as she pretended to be. You didn't run in the social circles she had without knowing how to read what people tried to keep hidden. It had had been rather obvious in Pylea that he considered her to be his. It was just more and more apparent that the possessiveness he felt about her wasn't entirely the same way as he felt toward Wesley, Gunn, Fred and even Lorne. She knew what he felt for her was more than just a vamp thing, or would have been if he were human. But he was a vampire, and living practically on top of him over the past couple years, Cordelia had learned that everything in Angel's existence was altered, changed and influenced by that reality. Just what this increasing familiarity would mean, in conjunction with the curse and all, was what kept her silent regarding their enigmatic relationship.
"Hellhounds, Angel. You remember, like the ones that attacked me at the dress shop, before the prom? A pack of about twenty will show up about an hour before dawn. If he's still there he won't manage to fend them off. For some reason the PTBs don't want that, so..." she trailed off.
"I'll go." Gunn said with a shrug which indicated he knew Angel hated the lawyer and pretty much agreed with him.
"Take Misters Finn and Miller with you," Wesley said.
Gunn rolled his eyes and held out his hand for Angel's keys, as his truck wouldn't seat four comfortably.
Angel continued to fuss over Cordelia. He insisted she lay down and shadowed her to the room just off the lobby which he had arraigned as a place for Cordelia to rest and recover from her visions. It had originally been a coat-check room and was large but had no windows. It was dim and quiet, conducive to soothing her pain.
"I'm fine, really." Cordelia lay on top of the daybed and Angel sat at the end and removed her shoes. She really didn't want to lay down but wasn't about to refuse a foot massage.
~~~~
"You're sure?" He watched carefully to see if she were hiding any pain. Angel sometimes thought Cordelia hid just how traumatic Seeing could be. He knew she had survived eighteen years on the Hellmouth but there was a limit to event Cordelia Chase's fabled resilience.
She gifted him with a weaker version of her million-dollar smile and nodded. As he applied gentle pressure to the arches of her feet she sighed and closed her eyes.
He worried about the damage the visions could do to her fragile human brain. He could tell by her scent and the way she held her head at times that the pain was far greater than she let on. Angel had secretly been consulting a Wiccan priestess to see if there were a safe way to have the visions transferred to him. Unfortunately, the woman had said that only death would relieve the Seer of her burden. Her response had made him flash back to just how irritating Buffy had found his cryptic comments when they had first met.
The tension had bled out of Cordelia's body and her breathing was just evening out when her eyes snapped open. She shuddered, then looked embarrassed and smiled. "I can't nap, I have too much to do."
Angel shifted closer and brushed her hair back. "What was it? A dream?"
"Just high school and Sunnydale - they both taint you for life," she said softly. "You wouldn't really have left him to the hellhounds? I mean... sure he's oily and evil-on-sabbatical, but hellhounds?" she said and shuddered again.
"Bad memories?" Angel asked. He expected Wes or Fred to pop in at any moment. He wondered sometimes if that was intentional, the way that he and Cordy only seemed to be left alone when they sparred. Fred, well she just had a harmless crush, but Wes... sometimes Angel though that the ex-Watcher was too attentive in his efforts to keep Angel's demon under-control.
"Good actually, except for the whole nearly dying theme that followed me from sophomore year 'til now. I just had way too much up close and personal time with hellhounds," she said.
"Yeah, I remember the tape. You and Xander both could have been killed while you were shopping for the prom." Angel said. Cordelia hadn't mentioned her ex much, not even after the brief return to her hometown where she was treated to a glimpse of his current courtship.
"As if! Shopping? With Xander Harris? Saint is not on my resume." She laughed. Angel had heard that sound far too infrequently lately. "Truth? Swear you won't tell."
"Promise." He grinned. Her laughter was infectious.
"I was working - a job - in retail. Me. Some things are just so wrong." She shook her head, fanning her dark hair across the pillow. "Xander saved me - again. Being that you know first hand how much I love having someone save my life when I'm trying to stay angry at them, I reacted as you might expect. And I ended up owing him big time. Not only did he keep my secret..."
"But?" Angel watched Cordelia's smile turn sad and wistful.
"You don't remember my prom dress, do you?" she said.
"It was midnight blue and it shimmered." Her smile blossomed up to full voltage at his reply.
"Normally, I had a dress and at least two back up dresses and I would finalize the decision based on my hair or the weather or whoever I ended up going with... but that wasn't an option for prom. I could only pick one dress and if I could only have one I wanted that one - not that I had any idea of how I was going to pay for it. But I deluded myself that with an employee discount and if I warped the quantum continuum I could somehow work enough hours to pay for it." She shook her head ruefully and Angel was transfixed by the highlights in her hair that only vampiric vision could see in the dim light. "So, prom night comes and my shift ends - I know I can't pay off the layaway - and the boss is so not simpatico with my charms. But as I go to leave, the other salesgirl said, "Chase don't forget your dress," and lo and behold 'someone' had paid for it. 'Someone' who knew I was working there. 'Someone' who could have paid me back big time for what a total bitch I was to him by telling everyone that Daddy lost his money, but didn't. 'Someone' who never had a dollar in his life that he didn't earn by his own sweat. 'Someone' who never said a word about it except 'it looks good on you.' I dated a lot of guys but..."
"But Xander?" Angel wasn't sure he wanted to know Cordelia feelings about Xander. She had seemed happy that he was involved. She certainly hadn't shown any signs of interest. Angel realized just how closely he had been monitoring her scent when Xander had been near.
"Xander treated me the best. No diamonds or ski weekends, but he was always a good friend. Even with the sarcasm and the digs, no matter how outwardly shitty we were to each other after we broke up, I always knew he would do anything..." Cordelia's looked away, her eyes were bright with unshed tears.
"Cordy? I thought you were okay with Xander..." Angel said.
"It's not that. I just...Doyle, you know?" She looked back at Angel and said, "Why do I never realize how lucky I am until I lose it all...? I just wish we had had a chance... that I had pulled my head out my... well, I didn't. Angel, what's wrong with me? I throw away kind, loving men and end up with Hacksaw spawn."
There wasn't really anything he could say to that. Angel was uncomfortably aware that he wasn't in Doyle's class and reluctantly admitted he probably wasn't in Xander's either. The boy had a tenacious loyalty Angel hadadmired even when he had been lacking his soul. While Cordelia seemed to be willing to forgive if not forget his sojourn with Darla, he knew he had deeply betrayed her trust in him during that fiasco and had a great deal make up for.
Fortunately, Fred chose that moment to creep in with a steaming paper tumbler of the chai from the coffee shop down the street that Cordelia loved. Since the young woman still hadn't ventured out of the Hyperion, she answered Angel questioning look with a whisper. "Wesley went and got it." After Cordelia thanked her, Fred said, "You have a half an hour 'til when Graham said that the caterer woman would be here."
"Catering?" Angel asked. Cordelia was planning a reception and dinner for the Sunnydale group for the evening they arrived, but Angel had assumed she would be budget conscious. Having seen Xander and the newest members of Angel Investigations eat he had hoped that the massive amounts of food needed to sate the men would consist of high-carb junk food like pizza or donuts.
"Graham has a trust fund. It's your fault, you sent Riley and Graham with me to shop. After forty minutes at Safeway and having only half of what was on the list he said he would foot the bill for having the gourmet food department cater the whole visit if I would just let them get the hell out of there. I thought Marines has more stamina." She sat up straighter and brushed back her shorter hair in a gesture he had seen a hundred times when she was trying to point out that she wasn't selfish, she just wanted to have her own way.
"Cordelia, Graham is not paying to entertain people he doesn't know," Angel said, opening his wallet.
"Not the whole visit, I have some standards." Fred scooted into the far corner, away from the former cheerleader. Cordelia stood and put a hand on her hip while sipping her sweet tea. "He grew up in a house that was on 'America's Castles'. Who knew one of *the* Millers was risking his life in some coverty, elite, military task force? Anyway, Graham is taking care of the welcome dinner, and you are taking us all for a night at Lorne's and to dinner at Jobarr's."
"A demon restaurant? Cordelia..." Angel was fighting the urge to laugh, Fred's eyes were the size of saucers. Cordelia had only been to the exotic eatery once with Angel, Wes and Harry before Gunn had joined the group. Cordelia had been shocked at the varied menu with had numerous delicacies that were potentially fatal to humans.
"They're from Sunnydale," Cordelia said, as if that was the end of the discussion.
^^^^^^^
Spike inhaled. Heaven and hell, he loved that scent - himself, on, in, around Xander. His. His boy, his mate, his world. It was an ascension, a boon, a bounty that he hadn't earned and didn't deserve. Here, now, for however long he could hold onto him given the violent nature of Xander's life and the fact that Fate, cruel bitch that she was, had fucked up every good thing in Spike's life - Xander was his paradise.
Indistinct voices tickled at Spike's ears. Willow and Dawn had arrived for the meeting, and he could hear them catching up with Tara in the shop above. The blonde witch had been working the evening shift and had closed up upon the men's arrival. The shy one had blushed a charming shade of pink when Xander said he needed Spike's help in the storeroom.
Spike stood up straight, having been bent over the table while Xander prepared him. Xander made a delicious growling noise at having his plans interrupted. Still evil, Spike smirked as he contemplated just how far to push his focused lover to achieve maximum results.
"Girls are here, Pet. Shall we go up?" Spike asked as he leaned back, luxuriating in the flesh-to-flesh contact as Xander's bare chest felt warm against his back.
"Huh?" Spike felt Xander's hair lightly lash the back of his neck as his mate tried to shake of his 'shag now' thought process and participate in the conversation. Xander's hair was getting long to Spike's delight and Xander chagrin. Every time Xander headed for the door with the intention of getting it cut, Spike shagged him silly.
Spike turned slowly in Xander's arms, so that he could enjoy this mate's struggle to speak. "Red and the Nibblet - they're here." Spike knew that he had no intention of stopping, and Xander had better know the same if he knew what was good for him. Still it was fun to wind the boy up. "We can order that pizza you've been hankering after."
Whack! Xander slapped the back of Spike's head and hissed out, "Rule number
one!" He then pulled up on Spike's hips, lifting the smaller man and pushing
him back over the table with his greater bulk. The human's warm hands slid down
to the inside of the vampire's thighs and in a surprisingly gentle move
nudged them apart before trailing up to spread the cheeks of his ass.
Spike's throaty chuckle morphed into a purr as Xander slid home.
~~~
"Yes," Wesley was musing out loud. "It's possible Mr. McDonald is our soul-wounded bard."
"Hm?" Cordelia turned her attention back to the matter at hand. The woman from the catering service had stayed only ten minutes. After briskly checking the facility for working outlets she had reviewed Cordelia's menu selection and efficiently diagramed the layout of serving table and seating.
Wesley put down his book and crossed a shelf. He sorted though some wooden scroll cases and unsheathed a parchment which he spread out on his desk. He moved the mouse on a nearby computer and after a moment said, "I gave up on this --- the original language is too obscure and the translation I managed to .... well nevermind." He read from the screen, "She who waits will unlock the door as darkness comes to light again. The one cast out by light and shadow will show the way and succor the twain. Two tainted hearts of light will seek and find the soul-wounded bard. Reasoned by heart instead of head the warrior frees the demon bold. Demon and slayer will storm the citadel yet the heart will reduce it to rubble. The Slayer will fail and rise again, united in pain with the world wrecker. "
"Not the end of the world again - I'm coordinating dinner for ten, no way is the world ending after all the work I've done." Cordelia strode over to the desk and a scowl marred her perfect face as she contemplated the offending document. "This is gibberish. Are you sure it's an apocalypse? Maybe we should scan it and send a copy to Giles."
"This document is older than any civilization on the planet, we will not be scanning it. Anyway, I believe that Rupert Giles learned the hazards eminent in scanning magical text."
"Have Spike take a look tomorrow night, he always liked to puzzle out secrets and odd language." Angel said, causing Wesley to jump as the vampire had silently glided up to peer over Cordelia's shoulder at the parchment. "I don't see why he would be a bard," Angel continued, either oblivious to or unrepentant for the start he gave the ex-Watcher, "it wasn't as if he sang all that well."
Cordelia rolled her eyes at Wesley. She wasn't sure if Angel really was tone deaf, as his own singing had implied, or his feelings for Lindsey colored his judgment, but she made a mental note to call the caterer and change the order for service from ten to twelve. It might be prudent, given the bard mentioned. to invite Lorne to the dinner party as well.
~~~
Xander had in the course of stuffing himself with barbequed chicken pizza, managed to avert Dawn's crisis. In the manner only known to fifteen year old girls, her life had been ruined. Stephanie's mom, who had been going to take the girls to a fashion show Saturday had had to move it to Friday so that she could fly out of town on business. This was apparently not an acceptable substitute. The Friday show was at a large department store, where the Saturday one was semi-haute couture and featured a designer that Dawn aspired to be able to afford one day.
Spike had sat blinking through Dawn's outrage, obviously wanting to make it
all better but befuddled by the ins and outs of the power of popularity and
the importance of Dawn being able to start school by saying she had actually
seen Tommy and not just his clothes. Xander flashed on all the conversations-
well, monologues-of Cordelia, which he had tuned out while trying to think of
the best way to ask her into the utility closet with out sounding desperate.
While Willow and Tara had smiled and nodded
sympathetically and Spike had agreed with everything Dawn said, Xander had slipped
into the office and made two phone calls. The first had been to Stephanie's
mom. Although he hadn't been able to charm her into leaving her daughter in
LA with them he did manage to take the tickets off her hands. The second had
been to Cordy. The girlish squeal she had let loose with told him that she wasn't
too put out at going to a private showing of the latest fashions with Dawn.
She even found use for the third ticket, although Xander hoped Fred, whoever
he was, knew what he was in for.
Dawn had made him feel like he saved the world from certain destruction when
she hugged his neck. Spike looked profoundly relieved that he had a happy Niblet
again, without being forced to attend the show himself. Willow smiled and winked,
the only one there who realized that the real added bonus was
that this would curtail a full day of Queen C's concept of organized fun. From
all the conference calls, the ex-cheerleader had been planning quite an active
week. It was a week now. What had started out as plans for a long weekend was
now starting with the Scoobies heading to LA on Thursday night and leaving for
Sunnydale the wee hours of following Friday. Xander had a vague memory about
something his granddad used to say about fish and guests, he wondered if it
only applied to the Hellmouth variety of both.
~~~~~
Willow skipped, which when you thought about it was what happened when you
bounced while walking. She smiled at Xander. Tara and Spike were following behind
them, each sporting individual looks of indulgence. Her lover had confided that
the sight of Xander and Willow in full-out babble-mode doing their tandem talking
was a mind-boggling sight. The times when they tandem-talked - covering two
entirely different subjects and alternating simultaneous questions and replies
- were rare. Tonight, though, Xander was angsting over leaving TJ in charge
of the Hellmouth, albeit with Giles
watching over him, while she was detailing the plans for their vacation, which
she had been coordinating with Cordelia. Spike managed to keep an eye on Xander
and on the surroundings as the four of them moved briskly down the sidewalk.
Upon reaching the girls' new apartment Xander and Spike were invited up to
move Willow's grandmother's highboy one more time. The monstrosity really wasn't
suited to their kitschy little place but Willow was determined to find a place
for it. As Xander and Spike carefully moved the cumbersome
antique from one corner to the other, Willow stood in the doorway to the kitchen
tilting her head to one side.
"Do not even think of saying you liked back there better," Xander grunted.
"No, no. I was just thinking..." she said.
Xander leaned against the highboy and gestured for her to continue.
"It would be ... bad manners, to kill Riley while he's living with Angel." She darted a nervous glance from Xander to Spike. "I mean, Cordy says Angel is all on board the Riley reclamation project, and, well, that Graham guy and he are kinda on Angel's team and all."
"Only a bleeding wanker like the poof would choose minions from the Initiative." Spike shifted to game face and back.
Tara slipped past Willow carrying a tray of four tumblers of homemade wine. She set it on the spot she had cleared on the end table before going for the drinks. She took a seat on the couch. "You're right," she said, "it looks much better there."
Willow smiled at her and nodded, but continued, "I'm not saying Riley should be forgiven, 'cause...well, I owe him a bludgeoning with a shovel, but well, in the interest of family relations and this is a vacation..."
"Relax, Will. We'll be good." Xander gave her a warm smile and plopped down with exaggerated exhaustion into an overstuffed, well-worn armchair. Spike moved to lean on its back and absently stroked Xander's thick dark hair. "So," he said with a twinkle in his brown eyes, "if you're sure no apocalypses are going to happen here while we're gone... think it'll follow us to LA?"
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