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Zarrah
Rating: NC-17 for Language/violence and sexual situations in later chapter's.
Disclaimer: Belong to Joss...not me
Summary: *Sequel to Lover's Walk*...Future...Year 2034....Eleven years after Buffy's death, Spike is living in LA helping Angel fight the good fight. How will he react when he comes face to face with ghost's from his past.
A/N...(This is 'NOT' a Buffy/Spike fic..you have been warned!) Also, this 'is' a sequel, so the story will make no sense what so ever if you don't read "Lover's Walk" first.
Spike tossed and turned as he laid in his bed. He had been there for hours thinking of everything that had happened earlier that night. He still hadn't heard Ravyn leave the spare room and he was beginning to wonder if she were still there.
Standing, he walked quietly down the hall and stopped at her door. Putting his head to the door he listened and was relieved when he heard the bed springs move.
Ravyn walked slowly to the door when she stood up. She knew Spike was on the other side, she could feel him there. Leaning her head on the door she waited, hoping he would knock or say something. When he didn't, but turned and left instead, she sighed lightly before returning to the bed.
She had sat in there all night wondering what she should do. She knew well enough to leave him be when he was upset, so she remained, locked up in there until he was ready to talk to her again....if he ever did.
Spike and Ravyn both sat quietly in their rooms, each wondering if the other would come out. As the sun slowly rose, they both settled in to a restless night of sleep.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"So you guy's are really going down there?" Dawn asked Angel as he woke the following evening.
"Yeah, as soon as Rob can decipher the information Ravyn gave him. It was kind of sketchy" he told her.
"You think you'll be able to find the temple?"
"Yeah, she was pretty certain on that...the way through the temple will be the hard part."
Dawn sat down and looked around for a minute before looking back over at him. "Did they...I mean, Spike and Ravyn...did they seem..okay when you were there the other night?" Dawn asked him.
"Yeah...seemed fine. Why?"
"Oh" Dawn said a little wide eyed. "No reason. Just wondering how the love birds were." she told him, smiling nervously. No one knew of their 'little problem' and she hoped it stayed that way.
Angel gave Dawn a peculiar look before standing. "Well...think I'll go. I have some work to do."
"Yeah, I 'm sure I do to." Dawn said as he left the room.
Dawn waited for Angel to leave before she picked up the phone, dialing Spike's number when she did. On the tenth ring, he finally answered.
"Ello" he said flatly.
"Spike...hey it's Dawn." she said smiling.
"Hey Dawn."
"Hey...is Ravyn around?" she asked, trying to sound casual about the nature of her call.
Spike looked up at the ceiling of his room and sighed. "Yeah...hang on, I'll go get her."
Spike stood, laying the phone down as he did and walked to the spare room. He knocked several times before taking a deep breath and opening the door.
"Ravyn?" he said as he peeked inside. He walked in, noticing she wasn't there and immediately thought the worst. Looking around he spotted her bags and sighed in relief.
He turned, walking into the living room and looked around before opening the door. That's when he saw her, sitting down on the beach staring out on the ocean. He knew why she was there and stood there and watched her for a few minutes before heading back to his room.
"She's out on the beach nibblet. Want me to have her call you when she gets back in?" he asked, not really ready to talk to Ravyn just yet.
"Yeah....sure. It wasn't that important anyway.....just girl talk." Dawn told him smiling. "I'll talk to you later Spike."
"Sure thing bit." Spike said as he hung up. Walking to the bathroom, he started the shower, hopeing the hot water would clear his mind and help him forget about what Ravyn had done.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Ravyn was sitting on the beach, her chin resting on her knees staring out at the ocean, watching the waves break against the shore. She had been out there ever since the sun had set, intent on not spending another night cooped up in that lifeless room again.
She had thought long and hard about the 'fight', if you wanted to call it that. She understood why Spike was upset, but she hadn't meant to hurt him. She knew she could go through with it if she just blocked everything out, so that's what she did.
He had waited patiently for over two months for her to get a 'grip' on the whole sex thing and when it wasn't happening...she did the only thing she knew how, to give him what she knew he wanted....what he needed. She just never expected it to turn out so bad.
Standing, Ravyn wrapped her arms around herself and walked down the beach, trying to clear her head. No matter how hard she tried, things never went the way they were suppose to where she and Spike were concerned. Something always messed it up. Her. She was what always messed it up.
She loved him and tried to hard to please him, only she never got that part quiet right. She was always to pushy or made bad decisions and wondered if he wouldn't be better off with her out of his life for good.
As the beach house slowly left her view, Ravyn slowed her steps and thought. *What have I done?* she asked herself. She knew she had a hard decision to make.....whether to stay with the only man she had ever loved.......or move on.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Randall sat in the corner of Caritas and watched the door hopeing that Ravyn and her 'new friends' would show. The Master's 'new pet' was seated next to him, out of site. He was only there for one reason....to find out where Ravyn was staying. He had been there every night that week, hopeing they would come. It was now Friday....hopefully, they would show soon.
He was beginning to believe he was wasting another night of precious time when he saw them. He smiled big as he saw Dawn, the small girl who had fought along with Ravyn. She was feisty and he liked her. He only wished his idiot companions would have been able to capture her.
As the group filled in, he craned his neck up, looking at them only to be disappointed when he didn't see Ravyn or her vampire. He watched them for hours, until they eventually left. He figured Friday was their night to party as he remembered it was Friday the last time he had seen Ravyn there. Standing, he grabbed the 'pet' and started for the door, intent on returning the following week.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Spike had sat on the deck all evening, watching Ravyn. She had sat on the beach all night and it was almost sunrise. She hadn't ate...that much he knew. He felt bad knowing she was stressing, but it left quickly as he remembered what she had done.
He still couldn't figure out where her head was. Yes he had wanted her....but not like that. Not some lifeless body who didn't even know he was there.
He felt almost...betrayed...by what she had done. In his mind, she had put him in the same category as those bastards who raped her repeatedly. He would have been no better than them if he would have taken her that way...even if she was willing to let it happen.
As he felt the first twinges of the coming sun, he saw Ravyn stand. He quickly stood himself and walked back inside, not ready to face her yet....not until he could get a grasp on what she had done and why. He couldn't talk to her again until the anger was gone. Screaming and yelling at her wasn't the way to handle this.
Making his way to his room, he shut the door behind him and waited...making sure she made it back inside. Once he heard the front door close he waited until the door to the spare room shut before he walked over to his bed, laying across it fully clothed. Closing his eyes, he sighed heavily, knowing for the second night in a row, he wouldn't be resting peacefully.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Spike stood on the deck watching Ravyn sit on the beach. It had been six days now and they had yet to speak to one another, hell he hadn't even seen her other than the way he saw her now. He missed her. He missed talking to her and hearing her laugh and the way she looked at him like there wasn't another person on the planet but him. Living in the same house together and the only thing he ever saw was her back as she stared out on the ocean. How did things go so wrong?
Getting angry with himself for letting the silence between them last so long, he finished off his fourth beer before turning and walking to his bike. The best way he knew to cover the pain was to get right good and pissed.
Starting his bike, he speed out of the driveway, intent on doing just that.
Ravyn turned when she heard the motorcycle and barely caught a glimpse of the taillights when Spike pulled out onto the road, wheels screeching across the pavement as he did. She wanted nothing more than to tell him how sorry she was and for things to go back to the way they were, but knew when he was ready to talk to her again he would come to her.....but he never did, which only left her to assume one thing. She had betrayed him and he didn't want her anymore.
Wiping the tears away from her face, Ravyn walked back to the house, locking the door behind her as she walked inside. Making her way over to the phone, she dialed the number Dawn had given her and hoped Lorne would be able to tell her what she needed to do.
As he picked up the phone, Lorne knew immediately who it was.
"Hey sweetie, I was wondering when you were going to call me." he said in his usual happy tone of voice.
"Hey Lorne." Ravyn said, on the brink of tears again.
"Need a friend?" he asked her.
That's all it took. Ravyn broke down crying. She was so lonely. She missed Spike and hadn't felt so isolated since she had been at Trull's.
"No need to answer sweetie. Are you at Spike's?" Lorne asked her.
"Yes" she managed to say through her tears.
"Okay doll. Hang on, I'll be there as soon as I can."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Spike walked into the nightclub, music blaring out of every corner. He watched as throngs of people danced and laughed as he made his way to the bar. Sitting himself down, he ordered a drink and turned in his seat, watching as happy couples everywhere enjoyed themselves.
"Here you go buddy." the bartender said as he handed Spike his drink.
"Thanks mate." Spike said quietly as he picked up the glass, swallowing it's contents quickly and motioning for another.
By his fifth one, he had already forgotten why he was even there. Standing on wobbly legs, he carried his drink to a small table in the corner, smiling as he passed two women as they gave him the 'once over'. *Still got it* he said with a smile as he sat.
Spike was mesmerized as the flashing multicolored lights played across the dance floor. His inebriated brain was losing focus on the painful world around him as a woman slowly approached his table. He watched her as she sat down beside him, smiling as she slid her chair close to him.
"Hey....names Rachel" she said as she leaned over close to him.
Spike looked at her. She wasn't bad looking. Short red hair, green eyes. He thought of Willow when he saw her. *Not that Willow ever looked that good in a dress though* he thought as he looked at her. Her small black dress was barely even on. He wondered if she was wearing it or was it wearing her.
"Names Spike." he told her as he leaned his head to the side and looked at her.
"Well Spike, here alone?"
"Seem's so." he told her taking another sip of his drink.
Rachel smiled over at him and laid her arm on the back of his chair. "You don't look to happy." she told him as she slowly raised her hand, playing with the hair at the back of his neck.
Spike looked at her, knowing exactly what she was after.
"Can't say that I am." he said as she leaned closer to him and he couldn't help but look down as the front of her dress gaped open slightly.
Rachel smiled when she saw his eyes roam. "So, want to tell me about it?"
"Not really." Spike told her, never taking his eyes off her bulging breast as they were laying there staring up at him.
"Well....how about I make it all better for you?" she said, leaning in closer, running her tongue along the contours of his ears.
Spike closed his eyes as she slowly licked at his ear. He knew she was trying to seduce him. It had been awhile since that had happened. He was usually the one playing this part. As her tongue entered his ear, he pulled his head away as he was slowly becoming more aroused by the second.
"Not tonight pet.....have other things on my mind." he told her, remembering why he was there.
"Oh...don't be like that." she told him. "Rachel knows what you need." she said as she lowered her hand down Spike's chest, resting it on the small bulge in his pants. "I can make you forget all about her."
Spike looked over at her as she squeezed at his groin. She was smiling at him and ready to do whatever he wanted.
"What do you say?" Rachel asked as she leaned her head closer to Spike's. Licking his lips slightly she smiled when she felt his cock twitch in her hand. "Let me show you what a real woman can do." she said as she kissed him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Hey Lorne" Ravyn said as she opened the door for him.
"Hey there sweetheart." Lorne said, giving her a small kiss on the cheek.
Ravyn shut the door, locking it back before turning and following Lorne to the sofa. She smiled weakly at him as she sat beside him.
"So...what's with the sad face?" he asked as he took in her sullen appearance.
Ravyn looked up at him, not sure if she could tell him everything. He could see the apprehension in her face and smiled.
"Don't worry about it. I already know most of the problem." he said smiling.
Ravyn's eye's went wide. Did Dawn tell him?
"Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me."
"Did Dawn....did she...."
"No. Dawn hasn't told me anything. I can read peoples voices. Usually only if they sing, but yours...now yours just screams at me." he told her as he took her hand. "I don't know the whole story, but I can see the pain radiating off you in waves."
Ravyn shook her head and smiled slightly. "Spike and I had a fight." she told him, not knowing where else to start. "It was....." Ravyn sighed heavily as she looked down. "It's just that I've had this problem."
Lorne gripped her hand tighter and smiled. "Tell ya what, you sing me a couple lines of any song your heart desires and you won't have to go through the painful part of telling what's wrong. I can just pick up with the helping part." he said smiling at her.
Ravyn smiled up at him. "Okay...but be warned. If Angel's voice makes your ears bleed....mine will probably make your head explode."
"NO ONE can be that bad doll." Lorne said chuckling.
Ravyn chuckled slightly with him, glad to have something worth smiling about.
"So, come on...just a couple of lines." Lorne told her.
"Any song?"
"Any song you want. Doesn't have to be special, hell it can even be something you made up." he told her.
Ravyn thought a minute and smiled. "Well, I always liked The Beatles" she told him smiling.
"Well, The Beatles it is." Lorne said. "Just pick one and let it flow."
Ravyn smiled nervously and took a deep breath. Only a few of her favorite songs came to mind and she picked the one that best suited her mood. "Here goes" she said smiling nervously up at him.
'The long and winding road that leads to your door,'
'Will never disappear,'
'I've seen that road before It always leads me here,'
'Leads me to your door'
Lorne smiled as he watched her. She stopped with the first verse and looked down.
"That was beautiful." Lorne told her. "I'm not sure who told you you couldn't sing but they were a complete liar." he said smiling at her.
Ravyn grinned at him as he smiled at her. "Thanks."
"Don't thank me yet sweetie. I haven't even told you anything you didn't already know."
"Just you being here helped. Knowing someone cares." she told him quietly as another tear fell.
"Don't you worry." he said as he pulled her into a tight hug. "We're going to fix this before the night is out."
Ravyn let him hold her as she started to cry again. She missed Spike and wanted him back, and would do anything to fix what she had done.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Rachel smiled as another round of drinks was placed on the table. She lifted hers as she looked over at Spike. He was watching the dance floor and she knew if she got him drunk enough, he'd be all hers.
"Here you go sweetie" she said as she slid another drink infront of Spike.
He lifted the glass and downed it quickly. He was getting lost in the moving people in front of him and preferred that to images of Ravyn at the moment. Everytime he thought of her, he was reminded of the past few days. He was there to forget about their problems. No more missing her. No more hating what she had done. No more wanting her. No more lonely nights without her.
Looking back over at Rachel he watched her as she stared at him, smiling.
"You about ready for me to make it all better now?" she asked finishing off her drink. "If so...then follow me."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Ravyn stood up from the couch and smiled as she led Lorne to the door.
"Thank You so much Lorne." she told him as they reached the door.
"No reason for thanks sweetie. I didn't tell you anything you didn't already know. You just weren't looking in the right place." he told her smiling. "Now you let me know if there's anything else I can do for you, you here?"
"Yeah, I will. I'm sure everythings going to be just fine now." she said as they walked out onto the deck.
"You want me to stay with you until Spike get's back?"
"No, it's getting late. He's probably on his way home now. I'll be just fine." she told him, finially happy knowing 'what' she needed to do.
"Well, okay then. You have that vampire of your's to bring you by Friday. I'm ready to cut loose and Dance the Night Away." he said, singing the last part.
Ravyn giggled at him as he walked over to the steps.
"I will. Bye"
"Bye doll. Lock up until Spike get's back." Lorne said as he walked to his car.
Ravyn waved at him as she watched him drive away before walking back into the house. Going into the bedroom, she picked out her night clothes and headed for the shower. She smiled to herself as she realized things were going to be just fine....well when Spike got home that is.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Spike groaned softly as the throbbing in his head increased. It felt like someone had taken a sledge hammer to him and left him for dead...well, deader.
"Ravyn?" he asked, his words slurred slightly while trying to get his tongue to work.
"No sweetie. That would be Rachel."
Spike's eye's flew open when he heard her. He looked around the room, a dark ugly motel room to be exact. He slammed his eyes back shut, hopeing when he opened them again, he'd be home, in his big silk covered bed.
"You know, if I knew you'd be so drunk you wouldn't even remember me the next day I wouldn't have bothered." Rachel said from her position beside Spike on the bed.
Spike felt like he needed to throw up. He slowly began playing the events of the previous night over in his head and mentally slapped himself when he remembered...well, what he could remember.
Lifting his head, he turned and saw her, laying on the pillow next to him. She wasn't nearly as good-looking as he remembered. *Mental note...don't get drunk and look at women, completly impairs your judgement* he thought as he looked at her.
"Uh...hey" Spike said as he looked at her.
"Hey" Rachel said as she watched him. "How's the head?"
Spike closed his eyes as she sat up, the sheet falling off her as she did. She was nude. "What have I done?" he asked himself quietly as he laid his head back down.
Spike tried to remember everything. He was lost after the first kiss in the bar. Had he had that much to drink? He looked back over at her and winced when he saw her. *Definitely had to much to drink* he thought after shutting his eyes again when he looked at her.
"You know, I don't usually take men home from clubs like that." Rachel said to him. "But you just looked so cute and completely lost." she told him as she stood.
Spike left his eyes closed. Looking at her made him know exactly what had happened. How could he do that? How could he do that to Ravyn?
'Ravyn.' Spike sighed as he thought of her. She would never forgive him for this. She barely did for him kissing Buffy, sleeping with someone....now that was the ultimate betrayal. Makes what she did almost laughable.
Spike's eyes flew open when he realized he had left her. Alone! He raised up quickly, regretting it as soon as he did. He sat there on his hands and knees a few minutes waiting for his head to stop pounding. When he was able to focus he turned stepping off the bed.
He looked down at himself and looked over at Rachel.
"Yeah, I know....hard to believe isn't it?" she told him.
"Uh...did, I mean what..."
"What happened?" Rachel asked. "Well, what happened was....I brought you here to have you fall flat on your drunk ass...that's what happened." she said, not looking to pleased.
Spike looked back down at his totally clothed body....and smiled. He closed his eyes and sighed in relief. He had been to wasted to do anything.
"Don't look to pleased." Rachel said rolling her eyes at him. "You 'should' feel bad. I was the one who lost sleep having to hear you moan 'Ravyn' and how much you 'love her' all night." she said sarcastically as she dressed. "Who the hell is she anyway?"
Spike smiled as he slipped his boots on. "The most amazing woman in the world" he said with a smile as he stood back up.
Walking over to the door, he looked back over at what would have been his biggest mistake 'ever'. "Sorry to pass out and run pet, but I have some groveling to do." he said as he opened the door and walked out into the night.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Spike drove home as fast as he could. He had already wasted half the night, having to hitch a ride back to the night club and get his bike. As he pulled into the driveway, he took a deep breath, hoping he hadn't messed things up completly by staying out all night.
Parking his bike, he killed the engine and walked up on the deck. He looked out to the beach and didn't see her. Opening the door, he quietly let himself in.
Ravyn wasn't in the living room, so Spike walked down the hall. Her door was shut. He was about to knock when he remembered. She had smelled Buffy on him last time. He wasn't about to make that mistake again.
Turning, he walked down the hall to his room, shutting the door quietly. After stripping off his clothes, which he knew were covered in Rachel's scent, he turned on the shower and stepped in.
Washing quickly he finished his shower and dried off, slipping on a pair of sweat pants. He walked out of his room, back down the hall and stopped at Ravyn's door.
He listened and heard nothing. He felt bad knowing she had probably been there all night. He should have never left like that. What did she think when he had?
Knocking softly, he waited. He was going to make this right. It didn't matter what she had done because he finally realized she had only done it for him. To please him.
Spike knocked a few more times, growing more impatient as the minutes passed.
"Ravyn...can I come in?" he asked her through the door.
After he still didn't get a response, Spike slowly turned the door handle and opened the door. He walked inside and saw that she wasn't there. Her bed hadn't been slept in either. He looked around before going back out to the living room.
Spike checked every room in the house before going to the door and looking out. He didn't see her sitting on the beach so he walked out to the end of the path. She was no where to be found.
Panic set in as he turned and ran back to the house. He stormed back in, running to the kitchen to see if there was a note or something saying she had went somewhere.
"Ravyn!" Spike yelled as he once again checked all the rooms. He checked the spare room she had been staying in again, noticing her bags were still there.
"Ravyn!" he yelled again as he walked through the house. Making his way back outside, he checked the rose garden. He walked around the entire house. She wasn't there.
Spike ran back down the path to the beach, yelling for her as he did. Stopping close to the water's edge, he looked down the beach in both directions, running a little each way to see if maybe she were further down than he could see.
Grabbing his head with both hands, Spike closed his eyes and tried to think. The first thing that came to his mind was......Trull.
Opening his eyes back up he looked towards the house as the first images of Trull coming and taking her away came to him.
His breathing came hard and fast, his fear escalated out of control. He 'promised' her he wouldn't let Trull take her again. *What have I done?*
"RAVYN!!"
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